building – The Conscious Pilgrim

I’m generally a pretty patient person, though I do have things I get excited about. However, “good things come to those who wait” has always been a phrase that irked me.

I understand the virtues of patience, but I have to say that whoever coined that phrase must have lived under a system other than capitalism, because around here, “good things come to those who get their hustle on” is much more accurate.

That said, I’m also not a hustler. My motivations in my daily life include a work-life balance that is generous on the ‘life’ side of the scale, and honestly if I was more motivated by money, I’d have more of it. I am motivated by time, though… and I enjoy a career position that rarely; if ever, inhibits my family time or my music making time. This is how my life is structured and I’m eternally grateful for it.

The real reason “good things come to those who wait” has nothing to do with any of that though, so much as it pertains to sitting on your ass waiting for good things to happen to you, which is flawed for reasons I shouldn’t have to point out, but I will anyway:

I believe good things happen to you when you’re ready.

The life I enjoy now, I have earned. Not only through hours worked or records made or gigs played, but through personal growth…
– books not only read, but taken to heart…
– miles not only traveled, but endured…
– lessons not only learned, but shared…

To say I got what I have by sitting and waiting is a massive understatement for what I have achieved in the meantime.

I’m reminded of a conversation with a friend that I used to describe how I wanted my life to be, and it’s the life I have now. I didn’t necessarily see it the way he saw it – from the 3rd person perspective – but he did show me not only how I have it, but how I built my life up to it.

I’m eternally grateful for the people in my life who remind me of these things, and that I didn’t just wait around for it to happen to me.

I have a full life, and I truly love my full life. At the risk of bragging, I have a family that consists of a very supportive girlfriend and a teenage daughter that wants to spend time with me. If you have a teenage daughter, you know that’s rare. I have an amazing dog that teaches me life’s most simple and important lessons every day… I have a fantastic job that doesn’t interfere with my art-life… and my art life is growing constantly.

There is no part of my life that actively interferes with any other part of my life and if that’s not balance, then I don’t know what is. I realize that I have manifested this; or in a more traditional sense, I built it.

The word manifest; itself, comes from two root words:
Manus – the latin noun for ‘hand’
Festus – which comes from the latin adjective ‘infestus’ which is the root for words like ‘infestation’ and ‘festival’

… so it more or less translates to hand party… or ‘to put a lot of your own hands into something.’ You cannot really manifest anything by sitting around and wishing for it… you have to put thought into action.

That’s the long way around… but it means: I wanted this and I created it.

This was made all to clear to me on a recent phone call with an old friend I don’t see anywhere near enough, where he reminded me of a conversation we’d had in our early 20s about what we wanted our future to be. We’d both fantasized about perfecting our artistic crafts in a humble way, being shit-hot writers and performers who lived covertly normal lives. Essentially being a big deal to a niche market, so we could have modestly nice homes surrounded by good neighbors who had no idea who we really were. A secret identity of sorts.

He spent a few minutes pointing out to me that I have exactly that life – with a few variables augmented slightly – but still, it’s a conversation I won’t soon forget that has filled me with gratitude.

So although this life is full, and occasionally it exhausts me… it was put this way with thoughtful intention and I am extremely grateful for it.