Tag: do your best

on the train

I have not been training as hard this summer as last summer… and it took a while, but I’m fine with it. This summer I worked on my car, painted a couple rooms in my house, and took on various construction projects at home… not to mention a new job and a few gigs… songwriting… some family things… and yes, even some training.

Completing a good number of things things I’ve done have brought about a sense of accomplishment, but that sense of accomplishment is fleeting. I recently heard an interview with Light Watkins wherein he states that the level of happiness you are feeling right now is the same level you will feel after completing a task – and it resonated with me very clearly because I know exactly what that means. To tackle a problem is great – but another problem will soon obstruct you, and the only way you can truly increase your happiness is to pursue your purpose.

So yes, it was a great summer, but I am back on the training train – and if I’m completely honest, part of why I am okay with not training so hard through the summer is because I am back to it now, to the degree that brings me the most joy.

That’s not to say that training is my purpose, but training does bring about an alignment of values – of heart, soul, and mind – and conditions me to be at my best physical shape when I am realizing my purpose. My actual purpose is one of service in the arts, but if I am polluted and out of shape, I will inevitably short-change the recipients of that service, be it at my day job or in my songwriting and performance career.

All in all, It feels so good to have reclaimed my routine of endurance, even if it has cost me part of my evening routine by way of an early bedtime… sorta. (it will once the lack of sleep catches up with me).

I have a full life, with great hobbies and great people in my life – but if I am not at my best, then I cannot give my best, and nobody wants the fractional version of me.

getting granular

“I choose to get granular. I know what the bigger picture is for my health journey and I know how it’s going. It’s good to ‘zoom out’ and acknowledge how far you’ve come as a way of encouraging yourself, or rather myself – but fine-tuning your practice and measuring results requires a detailed perspective… that extra couple reps, that extra few minutes of meditation, that faster lap, that extra page of writing, and extra half hour earlier you wake up…”

We’re all doing our best. I have to believe that and this is not the first time I’ve espoused such a notion. Even those people you disagree with that seem to be waiting in the shadows of the internet; ever ready to pounce on your good vibes are doing their best. Their best what? Beats me – but they truly believe they’re making a difference in their world, just as I do, and although I may disagree with the tactics they use and the viewpoint they broadcast, we do have that little shred of commonality.

I know I can’t change those people’s minds, and I know they won’t change mine. I can only change my perception of them, and the method by which I react – and if they have nothing but negative talk for me then I must acknowledge this:

“You will never find a hater that works harder than you” – David Goggins.

As much as David Goggins is liable to record himself reciting the hateful rhetoric of his online critics and listen to them while he works out, (and I am not going to do that) I will say that he has chosen how to react in his way, and I choose how to react in mine.

I choose to get granular. I know what the bigger picture is for my health journey and I know how it’s going. It’s good to ‘zoom out’ and acknowledge how far you’ve come as a way of encouraging yourself, or rather myself – but fine-tuning your practice and measuring results requires a detailed perspective… that extra couple reps, that extra few minutes of meditation, that faster lap, that extra page of writing, and extra half hour earlier you wake up…

I find that the number one criticism I receive; while fully acknowledging that it’s only criticism if I decide I’m being criticized, is people saying ‘that’s too extreme’ or that I should ‘take a break’. What I know now – today – is that I’ll take a break when I deem it appropriate, and that ‘extreme’ is a relative term. I can’t be measured by anyone’s yardstick but my own, and I seek satisfaction in knowing that I’m pushing myself to be better. There’s a more-than-good chance that I’m being encouraged to ingest some sort of chill pill; not because I need one, but because my efforts are making other people question their own discipline, and rather than intensifying their game, they’d prefer to see me de-tensify mine. That’s their struggle, I guess – but it doesn’t have to be mine.

So I’ll tell you right now:
If you want to weigh your food in order to track calories or macros better, do it. If you want to build muscle, do it.
If you want to run longer, do it.
If you want to be more mindful, do it.
If you want to eat cleaner, do it.

The world is full of people who carry their regrets of a misspent youth around with them, but taking action means you can leave those regrets in the rear view.

That means a being better athlete, a better writer, a better singer, a better guitar player, a better friend, a better mentor, a better partner, a better father, a better worker… I might be extreme compared to some people, but certainly not compared to others. For all I know, you could be looking at me thinking I’m not doing enough.

Just try to remember, everyone’s out here doing their best.
Me included.

This week has been solid. I’ve been pushing my speed on the track, and some heavy weights on the bench, and it’s been great. These hard workouts are a means to justify some weekend rest time, because aside from the workouts, I’m in a new position at work now and my brain has been pan-seared by the end of the week, and in need of some artistic expression.

So it’s been 4 intense days, with some calorie cutting and dietary fine-tuning, and some much needed attention to some other matters around the house that will set me up for success in the future.

Once it’s the snow melts and we’re back outside, there’ll be a 5th day for trail running. Can’t wait.

well-meaning

“the knowledge that everyone is doing their best should grant us all a little leeway, perhaps even a shot at redemption and forgiveness now & then – the flip-side of that would mean we’d have to be patient with each other”

In the spirit of the season where we tend to gather with our family and loved ones, I feel compelled to broach this topic. Chances are pretty good that if you have a family that you’re in semi-regular contact with, they spend some time driving you nuts… and really, you don’t have to be blood to be family.

I have challenges with people in my life as we all do and as easy as it is for my overactive analytical mind to vilify those folks, I’ve been trying to take things more at face value rather than to find some more deeper, sinister meaning. I’ve come to realize a few things, many of which I’ve shared and many more that I eventually will share.

One of those things is: Everyone is doing their best.

This is universal. Nobody I know is going out of their way to be the villain in any scenario – at best they’re unwittingly being selfish or insensitive, in which case they’d be doing their best to look out for themselves. We all try (and often fail) to relate to each other through humor and sarcasm, through being nosey, through asking hard questions, and many other generally irritating things day in & day out and sometimes they’re received well and sometimes they’re not. I make a diligent effort not to drive my own kid bonkers the way my own parents have a capacity to do to me, but I’m sure I miss the mark more often than I’m aware.

In any event, I know I am loved even though I am often misunderstood.
I want my child to know the same.

In any event, the knowledge that everyone is doing their best should grant us all a little leeway, perhaps even a shot at redemption and forgiveness now & then – the flip-side of that would mean we’d have to be patient with each other, of course.

The other thought today, which is not dissimilar, is: I cannot control what someone else thinks or does. I can only control my actions or reactions.

If someone says something upsetting to me, I can choose not to get upset. We all have that kind of control – we know it because we’ve all dined with an elderly person who’s said something antiquated and narrow-minded and we’ve let it go before as a courtesy. We likely didn’t agree with what was said but we also should have no interest in embarrassing anyone, so at our most aggressive we can try to help them see things from another point of view, respectfully.

In this same way we can choose not to take jokes personally, and we can choose not to make jokes at others’ expense. We can protect others from our commentary simply by not commenting. We can stifle our reactions – not because we’re weak or passive, but because we’re strong enough to let the moment pass… because not everything needs defending and not every conversation needs to be an argument.

I endeavor to only really worry about things that are in my control and to disregard things that are not. The result has been that I hold much more sway over important matters because I’ve saved my energy for them, and that energy was saved because it wasn’t misspent on other things.

In essence, I won’t worry much about people’s feelings on a particular topic, but I also won’t hurt their feelings in the first place – which means I won’t have to worry about their feelings, and they won’t react negatively to my commentary. I can misspeak, and I can apologize if need be.

I try my damnedest to let the hard moments pass and savor the good ones. This is how great memories are made, particularly around memorable occasions like Christmas & New Years’. You’ll never hear me say that the holidays aren’t a trying time, and I’m sensitive to those who’ve had hard holidays. I fully realize that some of this comes years too late for some, but it’s never too late to set a positive tone with the people around you now.

So whether it be in the spirit of the season, or just in the spirit of the fact that we’re all a bunch of evolved primates trying to navigate a series of social engagements when we’d rather hide under the blankets of our warm beds… try and take it easy on people, and try and take it easy on yourself.

This week I shuffled some workout sessions around. I’m finding that in some ways I’ve bitten off more than I can chew, and on other days I’ve got way more energy to spend – so I’m trying to balance these things out for consistent effort.

Monday saw me at the gym at 6am, doing the cardio and weight training that Tuesday would normally host, but Tuesday was fraught with appointments. Wednesday maintained it’s rest status since Tuesday can be a late night for me.
Thursday was amplified in a big way. 75 minutes in Zone 2 on the bike followed by 10 minutes on the rowing machine, which was a fun addition. I’ve used the rowing machine before but not in a serious or regular way, so I’ll be incorporating that a bit more.
Friday was a 30 minute run around the track at my gym, followed by a triceps/back workout, and Saturday had an interruption from our regularly scheduled program due to an appointment, but would have been a 90 minute bike/run.

All in all, this is a better system, and I ultimately get 6.5 hours of training in every week. 7.5 if I get a swim in, which has been challenging, so I’m calling that a ‘bonus’ session at this point.

The kicker has been that on Monday, Thursday and Friday, I stayed at the gym for an extra half hour and then went straight to work – and adjustment, to be sure, but one I can roll with.

Moving my Tuesday workout helps me get more done on Tuesday… since I’m often at the gym for a couple hours, once I account for locker room time, transportation, etc. a good chunk of my days is spent. This is a possible solution because I need some uninterrupted time in a creative space, and I’m hopeful this will help. I’ll still be able to do some calisthenics at home on Tuesday, which is my plan, but likely just as a measure of getting a few things done that don’t get done on other days.

As soon as I establish balance, something else will come up… but I will welcome it, because that is what happens in a fruitful life.