Tag: blog

consistency

Spring is coming and I can feel it. I’ve done a very good job of staying consistent with training indoors through the summer months but I am very keen to get into the river valley and do some running and biking.

Before long I’ll have my summer tour schedule and I’ll know if & when I can race this summer. I might be too busy again this year but I guess we’ll see what shakes out. I do have a new album to promote and the summers are short and fraught with festivals in this part of the world.

I’ve been running between 45 and 60 minutes per day, 5 days per week – followed by a 30-45 minute weight session. Naturally that’ll have to change a bit once the snow melts and I’m back outside, but realistically it’ll be the May Long Weekend before I’m really digging into Edmonton’s river valley. It stays pretty cold and icy down there for a long time under the shade of all those trees, so realistically I have a quarter of the year to go before it really matters.

In the meantime… consistency is key. But progressive consistency…

My goals in the next few months are to extend my running intervals and shorten my walking intervals. Part of my desire to extend running intervals stems from a desire to get on the stationary bike more than I have been, as well as getting into the pool now for a bit before I find myself in the tattoo chair again, which pulls me out of the water for a while each time. With my weightlifting, I’m already going to failure on the final set of each exercise. The next step is progressive loading, which I am doing a bit of already as well.

I’m trying not to get too far ahead of myself.

Often I will devise a new plan for the future, and then say “why wait” and dive into a new routine, but I’m really trying to ride this out so that when I do change, it’s an appropriate shock to my system. I aim to change my diet a bit once we’re into a season where food grows, as food that grows on trees and bushes is rather important when you’re vegan.

I’ve been learning that this fitness routine and priority is of great advantage to me in my newfound condition. Not that my condition is new, but the knowledge of it is rather new to me. I’ll be speaking on that more in the future, as I’m still just wrapping my head around it, but as it turns out – healthy diet and regular exercise remains very important for those who are fortunate enough to be able to do it.

Before you speculate on my condition, please know that I am happy to have it, as it’s part of who I am. The only thing new or startling about it is that I wasn’t aware of it before, but at this stage of my life where I’m implemented so much positive change, I’m ready to take on this new thing in a positive light. It’s certainly not as scary as it would have been 10 years ago.

… only a little scary.
More on that later.

Thanks for reading.

mixed bag

In all honesty, I have been quietly considering stopping this blog.

Not because I didn’t have anything worth talking about, but because everything I’ve been doing has been sort of… mechanical. Not mechanical in the sense that it’s emotionless or straightforward, but I’ve literally just been doing the “work” part of my art for a while.

I have been creating… so, it’s not that.

I’ve been recording songs with my band for months at this point. This is where all the creativity becomes tangible, and as much as it IS creative work, it’s also a realization of things we’ve already created. It’s a difficult thing to blog about because the process takes some real time to accomplish.

It’s a mechanical process in a lot of ways.

I’ve also been writing quite a bit. Also a difficult thing to specifically talk about for a big pile of reasons without sharing what I’ve been writing. I suppose I’m not averse to that, but it would lack context at this point.

I’ve been learning how to create guitar pedals.

Again… a difficult thing to talk about directly without getting into the weeds. It inspires creativity, but is very mechanical in it’s execution. If one is proverbially supposed to walk before they metaphorically run, then I am figuratively crawling right now.

I’m training, but not for any particular event.

It’s hard to discuss training for an event that doesn’t exist just yet. I’ve got my eye on a race or two that I’d like to run, but it’s difficult to know if I’ll be able to participate before knowing what my performance schedule for the summer is. Though… I’m sure to do some fitness blogging soon.

So; that, too, is a bit mechanical.

And then spiritually…

Well, I won’t say I’m at a stand-still spiritually… but this time of year, by spirituality is strained because I live in Canada and my spiritual connection to nature is on an extended pause.

HOWEVER… I have been on a bit of a journey of self discovery that includes seeking out some professional help in assessing my modus operandi and what makes me tick; upstairs, and it’s been a wild ride so far. I’m not sure how it relates to me on a spiritual level other than the fact that I am a spiritual person who’s going through some stuff… but I guess we’ll see! It’s been really insightful and special, but there have been some definite times of absolute suckdom, if I may be so bold as to invent a word for it.

Again… not something I can really dig into until I have a formal diagnosis but I’ve certainly been challenged, and overwhelmed, and enlightened, and I’m certain that there is some meaningful writing coming around the bend.

So please stay with me as I gradually get to a place where I can be more open about what’s been happening… because it’s a lot.

full plate

This is a time of year I have a lot on the go.

With the turning of the year behind us comes doctor’s appointments and dentist appointments… then there’s festival booking schedules, photo shoots, the planning of a release party for a new album, and the time and money spent making that album become a physical product… it’s also a rather busy time at work gearing up for the fiscal year end, which is a significant part of my day-job and involves some travel. I’m also anticipating some life changes for some people in my family, including my daughter who becomes a legal adult and has just been accepted to the University of her choice.

It’s also Valentine’s Day today… but I won’t dig too far into that.

I’m also still recording. We don’t talk about it widely because it’s such a long process, but as we Confusionaires prepare to release an album this year, we’re also embarking on recording an album to be released next year… or whenever it suits us, really. We’d really like to have one in the chamber ready to release if and when the time is right. If this year’s album creates a lot of attention for us, we want to be ready to follow it up and would really rather that unpreparedness not be a factor.

It’s important to handle the self care in the midst of it all though.

It’s a hard time of year for those of us who have mental health difficulties, so as a baseline there’s a daily regimen of physical activity, nutrient-dense diet, and a decent amount of sleep; decent sleep being the hardest of the trifecta to implement.

And as much as life is happening and things are moving forward in all aspects, I still feel like I’m waiting for the finish line to come to ME in some ways. Anticipating a referral call… Anticipating appointments… anticipating deliveries…

To say I feel helpless would be a BIG stretch… as big as the stretch my great dane gives up when he climbs off the couch after a day of snoozing… but patience is certainly a virtue that is escaping me at the moment.

I’ll be okay.
I always am.

Oh, and uhh… Happy Valentine’s Day.
It’s not every day that we get wrapped up in the sentimental nature of a holiday invented by retail companies. Try and enjoy it!

milestones

I’ve been dancing around talking about this because the process is so long, and occasionally painstaking, but my rock & roll band has completed another record. It’s bittersweet in a number of different ways…

It’s a pleasure to have completed what we set out to do, and the record sounds absolutely massive. It’s a relentless rock & roll record, to be pressed on 10-inch vinyl with 7 songs on it. The artwork is a fantastic contribution from a friend and favored artist. Everything about it is exciting.

However… now that the work is done… the work begins.

It’s not enough to make a record, and it’s not enough to have it mixed and mastered, and it’s not enough to have killer artwork.

We have to go cram it down everyone’s throats for the coming year or so.
We’re put thousands of kilometers on our tour vehicle, to play dozens of shows all over Western Canada. Digital uploads to streaming services, piles upon piles of gas receipts, burger joint stops, disposable coffee cups… merch booth set-ups… drunk patrons… amazing fans… playing shows with amazing bands… in amazing venues… all in hopes that we’ll run out of our brand new product as fast as possible.

It’s all coming at us quickly and we’re excited to share what we’ve done – so sometimes it’s hard to just stop and enjoy the moment of completion…

But I think we have to take those moments.
This rock & roll thing is really fun and as difficult as it can be to get our thing done the way we like it to be… it’s super fun and I am honoured to be able to do it with THESE guys.

There will be more shows.
There will be more songs.
There will be more records.

No reason not to stop and relish in the accomplishments when the opportunity to do so arises.

outlets

I’ve recently taken on a new project, and a direction of learning I’ve never spent any time with before. It’s a wild trip, if I’m being honest. I purchased an online course during boxing week and it’s likely the closest thing to a New Year’s Resolution I’ve ever done… though the timing is somewhat coincidental.

I’ve decided to dig in on Brian Wampler’s guitar pedal building course, which is a very thorough and fairly in-depth way of learning all the ins & outs (HA!) of guitar pedal building.

I’ve long been frustrated with the availability of things I need in order to accomplish what I want to accomplish as a performer. I have a number of great pieces of equipment I’ve acquired over the years but there is a piece of the guitar effects market that; I feel, anyway, is largely ignored. I can’t be certain that there’s a market for what I’m hoping to accomplish once I attain the knowledge I’m setting out to find, but it’s quite possible that there is. I’m hesitant to get into what that is in the event that this does turn into some measure of side-hustle but there are some things I know about myself that are definitely helpful here:

  • I am really good at playing guitar
  • I am really good at getting sounds I am happy with
  • I have an intense level of focus
  • I have an artistic vision

But… if all I end up doing is building things for myself then I honestly think I’ll be happy with that… but you never know how things will go until they go. Anyway, it’s very exciting and extremely nerdy and I’m happy to have this new direction of learning.

If you tuned in to this blog from some spiritually-driven snack, and feel like you’ve been denied that, don’t worry… I’m not done yet.

It might sound a little bonkers, but this is truly something that aligns with me spiritually and is truly helping me navigate the prairie winter months. When I am immersed in this, it can only happen in real time… it’s an incredible experience where I am not thinking about food, or work, or anything except for what’s in front of me. It’s an incredibly meditative (active meditation, obviously) and grounding (HA!) experience that seems to tie me to the present moment in a special way.

Sure, I have other things in my life that offer that level of detachment from the world around me, but the way my brain seems to thrive is to have a few options to alternate through – songwriting and composition, recording, performing, my vintage automotive pursuits, and now this new exercise – all provide me with a break from my distractions and put me into a moment where I can completely lose track of time and just create.

It’s thrilling.

refinement

The holidays in the rear view, the statistically-speaking saddest week of the year is behind me, and yes; even the contingent of people who made New Years’ resolutions to go to the gym and stare at their phones while obstructing equipment have started to thin-out as the temperatures get colder here in Alberta’s capital city. You may not be experiencing that 3rd event just yet, but it’s fair to say there weren’t that many people who resolved to go to the gym in the early morning hours as there were who resolved to go after work.

I’ve been feeling like it’s time to refine things a bit – to add structure.
Lofty goals require lofty means.

I’m currently on the treadmill between 45 and 60 minutes 3 days a week, on a stationary bike for 30 minutes 3 days a week, and lifting weights 2 days a week (“a push day” and a “pull day”) and before you tell me that’s 8 days per week, a workout is 2 hours.

For those who care, the new target is 45-60 minutes of cardio, and 2 sets (to failure) of 5 exercises, 5 days a week.

I’m also compelled to refine my art life. Specifically songwriting.

One of the things I like to do while I’m on the treadmill is listen to an album front-to-back that I am either (a) no very familiar with, or (b) a total stranger to… and in so doing, I’ve learned that not all music is treadmill music… but I’ve ALSO come to critique and scrutinize my own methods of making songs by way of hearing elements of songs that make me think “I wish I was doing that!”

Now, I don’t wish to change what I’m doing from the ground up, but there are elements of songs that I’ve come across from the twangiest bluegrass, to the durgiest synth music, to the heaviest metal that can sometimes be the difference between a good song and a great song – in any genre. I don’t want to spill the guts any more than that, other than to say that the greatest bands take on a life of their own at a certain point, and they become bigger and better than the sum of their parts.

I believe my band has already don this, but there are still ways to hone and shape what we’re doing to take it somewhere new… because another thing that great bands do is transcend their own genres… because a genre is just a box, and once you figure out how to break out of that box without compromising your own values, that’s when it gets really wild.

That’s where I’m going.

here we go again

We’re a couple days into 2026 now, and although I’ve done my level best to clean up my feed, there’s still so much negative posting about 2025… celebrity deaths being the main culprit, I suppose, as there’s been a bunch of those in the past little while.

I’ve got some real sour news for everyone. If you’re hanging your entire year on the prospect that no celebrities, filmmakers, or musicians you ever liked will die then you are setting yourself up for massive disappointment. Death is really the only thing we’re guaranteed in this life, as it’s the only thing that fate really owes any of us.

Of course, many of these are close to home, and it’s perfectly natural to be upset about the loss of people who shaped your childhood. I’m still upset about Harold Ramis, and nobody can take that away from me, BUT the people who enriched your life as you were growing up are much older than you, and they; too, are given a finite number of days to spend on this planet.

We’re lucky to be alive at the same time as any of them.

This year is going to have it’s ups and downs.
Some really great things are going to happen.
Some absolute shit things are going to happen, too.

How do you want to handle them?
I recommend grace and optimism.

I used to refer to myself as a realist, until one day I came to the conclusion that this “realistic” view of the world I was holding onto was inherently negative. I guess bad things happen… but good things happen just as often, sometimes more often.

I can’t honestly say that my life is worse now than it was a year ago… maybe you CAN say that, but we all have the power to improve things in our lives. It starts with wanting it, but you’re going to have to do some work to get there.

I wish you all the best this year.